Wednesday, June 27, 2012
Thursday, June 14, 2012
Bouncing Back from Job Loss: The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Job Hunters
By Margie Warrell
A friend recently shared with me how
her husband fell into yearlong depression after he was laid off from his
finance job during the global economic meltdown in late 2008. He’d worked hard
all his life, thrived on the pressures and challenges of his work, and enjoyed
the money he earned. Becoming unemployed for the first time in his midforties
was a huge kick in the gut, and one he didn’t cope with very well.
There’s no two ways about it: Losing your job is hard. Whether it
has everything to do with your performance, or nothing at all, it’s still hard.
However, if you look at job loss, like any setback from an enlarged
perspective, you realize that success in life is measured far less by our
opportunities than by how we respond to life’s setbacks and challenges.
The story of my friend’s husband is one I’ve heard many times. The
challenge people in that situation face is how they handle not only the loss of
their job, but the many emotions that can arise. These range from a sense of
humiliation, failure and vulnerability, to anxiety, resentment and self-pity.
Sure, losing your job can be a blow to your back pocket, but it’s often an even
bigger blow to your ego and self worth.
Over the last few years, millions of people have found themselves
involuntarily out of work—too often through no fault of their own. This
year, many will again. But whether the reason you lost your job has
everything to do with your perceived performance, or absolutely nothing, it’s
how you respond in the wake of it that will set you apart from others when it
comes to finding a new job. When it comes to a successful job hunt, attitude is
everything. A proactive and positive mindset will differentiate you from
the masses, making all the difference in how “lucky” you get in an unlucky
economy. It will even determine whether you one day look back on this time with
some measure of gratitude for what you gained from it—whether it was the chance
to re-evaluate your life, spend extra time with your family, teach your kids
about budgeting, or to simply re-affirm what matters most.
Confucius
said that our natures are alike (i.e. no one likes being sacked), it’s our
habits are that separate us. Below are seven habits to separate yourself from
the pack, move your job application to the top of the pile, and land yourself
not only back into a job, but perhaps an even better one than before.
1. Stay future-focused.
It’s easy
to get stuck in the past and what shoulda-woulda-coulda happened, but didn’t.
Doing so only perpetuates destructive emotions that fuel anger, self-pity and a
sense of powerlessness. Focus on the future, and on what you need to do to set
yourself up as well as possible on the job front, in how you are budgeting your
money, and in your relationship with those who can help you find a new job.
What you focus on expands, so focus on what you want, not on what you don’t.
2. Don’t let your job
status define you.
Sure,
losing your job is a very personal experience, but don’t take it too
personally. Who you are is not what you do. Never was. Never will be. Research
by psychologist Marty Seligman found that the biggest determinant between those
who succeed after setbacks of any kind is how they interpret them. People who
interpret losing their job as a sign of personal inadequacy or failure are less
likely to ‘get back on the horse’ in their job hunt than those who interpret it
as an unfortunate circumstance that provided a valuable opportunity to grow in
self-awareness, re-evaluate priorities and build resilience. You define who you
are, not your job or a company’s decision whether or not to employ you. Don’t
take it as a personal rejection against you. It may well be due to economic
forces far beyond your control that you found yourself out of work. Potential
employers will be more attracted to people who have proven their ability to
stay positive and confident despite a setback/job loss.
3. Prioritize self-care.
When
you’ve lost your job it is all too easy plant yourself on the couch, remote in
one hand, beer or bag of chips in the other, and wallow in self-pity. Many do!
But mental and emotional resilience requires physical resilience. So be
intentional about taking care of YOU and doing whatever it takes to feel strong
and fit. (After all, you now have no excuse that you don’t have time for
exercise.) Studies have found that exercise builds resilience, leaving you more
immune to stress. Get outdoors, go for a run, do some gardening, or just do
something that lifts your spirits – whether building your kids a cubby house or
taking your dog to the beach – and helps to shift the negative emotions that
have the potential to keep you from being proactive in your job hunt.
4. Surround yourself with
positive people.
Emotions
are contagious. The people around you impact how you see yourself, your
situation and what you do to improve it. Be intentional about who you hang out
with and don’t get sucked into the vortex of those who want a marathon pity
party. It wastes precious time and energy far better spent getting back into
the workforce. Surround yourself with people who lift you up, and avoid those
who don’t. Read positive books, watch inspiring movies, and remember that your
family will take their cue from you. Let them know that while you may not have
chosen your circumstances, you are confident that with time and effort, you
will all pull through together, and be all the stronger and wiser for it.
5. Tap your network.
The more
people who know what you want, the more who can help you get it. The vast
majority of jobs are never advertised. So the adage “Your network is your net
worth” is particularly relevant when it comes to finding those jobs that are
filled via word of mouth. Reach out to people you know and enlist their support
in making any introductions or connections that could help you. Whatever you
do, never underestimate the power of your network to open up opportunities and
land you that “lucky break” you were hoping for.
6. Treat finding a job as a
job.
If you
feel the need, and can afford to do it, give yourself a break for a few days or
week or two. But assuming you can’t afford a year sailing the world on the
Queen Mary, don’t take too long before returning to your familiar routine.
Create structure in your day. Sure you have more time on your hands than you
had before, but you will be amazed at how little you can do in a day if you
aren’t intentional about what you want to get done. Create a job search plan
with goals and small manageable steps. Then prioritize, structure your day and
treat finding a job as a job.
7. Extend kindness.
It’s
pretty simple really: extending kindness toward others makes us feel good. It’s
not just a nice thing to do something for others – whether helping a neighbor
or volunteering in a local soup kitchen – it’s actually a helpful thing to do
for ourselves. Yes, scientists have found that acts of kindness produce some of
the same “feel good” chemicals in the brain as anti-depressants. In addition,
when we give our time to help others, it helps us stop dwelling on our own
problems, and makes us realize how much we have to be thankful for. It can also
can be an effective way to build your network, and show potential employers you
are not sitting idly by waiting for work to come your way. There’s no better
mood booster than making a difference for someone else, even when you wish your
own life were different than it is.
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